How To Be Memorable Around Women And Create Attraction

How To Be Memorable Around Women And Create Attraction

Today I’m here in rainy London, what a shock rain in London this never happens right? Ah! Anyways we’re here talking to today, walking around and doing a little coaching, and one of the things I was talking about was how to be really memorable.

Most people are not memorable. Most people walk in the store to shop, and they walk in with an objective in mind such as to go buy a shirt, or a soda, a coffee or whatever it might be. But they don’t connect with anyone, and that’s one of the biggest mistakes you can possibly make. When I walk into a store, for one I always want to be memorable, because if I go back to that store I want to be greeted like an old friend. So when I walk in I slow down, and I walk really slow and look around, immediately making direct eye contact with the person behind the register or the person walking around. I say, “How are you today”, or “How is your day going”, and immediately begin bonding with that person.

The reason being is because they are in zombie mode, as in an “Oh God I have to work at this store, I don’t like working here, and all the customers are rude”. Yet all of the sudden you become that guy, and you ask them something, like “how’s your day going”, and they start telling you, so you listen a bit and you find out something about them. But here’s the most important thing, you go to the same stores every single day, most of them being the exact same ones, but yet you don’t engage with that person behind the register.

Today we went to a sandwich shop, and I looked at the woman behind the register and I had an egg sandwich, and I said, “Maybe I’ll get the bacon one, what’s your favorite”? So she looked at me and said, “Ah, you got the egg one right”? So we played around for a bit and we talked, and I’m sure you wish you saw the conversation, but I’m giving you the highlights anyways. And all of the sudden as I left I looked at her and said “Annie you have a great day”, and she said, “You too” back to me. 

So the next time I see her I can go, “Hey Annie how are you?” Meanwhile, Annie might be checking out somebody at the register who’s paying for food, and that might be the beautiful woman you always wanted to talk to. However it’s about creating attraction, and becoming memorable then creates attraction for all the customers in that store because you knew the store clerk or store manager.

That’s it, time to go enjoy the rain. 

This article originally posted on: http://www.nextluxury.com/mens-lifestyle-advice/how-to-be-memorable-around-women-and-create-attraction  I loved it, So I published it. I hope Admin wont mind for this cause I give him a backlink and full credits.
 

7 Reasons Women Fall Out of Love

Love is a beautiful thing, until it fades away. The ladies have spoken — and here are some main reasons why they lose that loving’ feeling…

The Honeymoon is Over

Some lovely ladies aren’t the most realistic – and expect life to be sunshine and roses 24/7. After the newness of love begins to fade, and the focus is often on paying bills, work or other responsibilities, they lose interest. Reality bites – just a little too much for some poor souls, unfortunately. It’s likely in these cases the women have some serious growing up to do.

They Stop Feeling Adored

Feeling appreciated, acknowledged and special is super important for women, who often balance and juggle so many things in life. Women are moms, housekeepers, cooks, businesswomen, caretakers, etc. While many women say they love doing it all and wouldn’t have it any other way – feeling adored by their partner makes it all worth it. Often times men will express their feelings of gratitude in the beginning, but get complacent after the novelty of the new relationship wears off. Compliments and recognition are two things women love … forever, guys!

We’ve Changed or (It’s Not You, It’s Me!)

The fact is, what women want in their twenties differs greatly with what they are looking for in their thirties, forties and beyond. While the hard-to-get bad boy is thrilling and a real challenge when one is younger, it is the genuine, loyal guy that most of us will fall in love with later on, when security is also a priority. There’s something to be said about waiting a bit to settle down – at least until you know yourself pretty darn well.

Emotional Disconnect

There is a common thread through many of these reasons, and it is poor communication – or none at all. It is crucial that partners remain connected and make each other a priority. Getting distracted by daily life does happen, but one should always seek to bring it back to what matters most – the love between the two people. We all need to feel loved and when we don’t, some of us will shut down and eventually the love fades away.

Loss of Independence

There is such a thing as “healthy separateness” in a relationship. It’s important that both women and men retain their own friends, own activities and personal interests after they get together. When your partner becomes the end-all-be-all, they also may make you incredible resentful at what you have given up to be with them. The best couples figure out how to maintain their own identities as individuals as well. We'd love to hear what made you fall out of love. Was there a defining moment or a gradual change in your feelings?

Boredom

“We’ve gotten into the worst rut. We do the same things every weekend. He never has any ideas or takes any initiative to plan anything.” We heard this several times from frustrated ladies who were sensing a complete lack of interest or passion from their mates. To keep a relationship thriving, you’ve got to keep it interesting and put some thought and energy into it. What’s that they say about tending to the garden? Well, it’s true.

Wherefore Art Thou Chemistry?

Some women get addicted to that initial stage – the warm feeling in the pit of your stomach when you know you are going to see your love. As anyone knows who has been in a relationship long enough, chemistry often fades, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but for some that means it’s time to move on. It may not be the most mature point of view – but it’s a choice women make when the sparks have dwindled.

6 of The Worst Lies We Tell Ourselves and What to Do About Each

There are many sorts of lies we tell ourselves.
Some are innocent – we tell them to protect someone because we think it’s better if he doesn’t know about it, or because they can hurt many people. Others are even less damaging – we don’t want to burden others with our problems and tell them we’re fine, or when we want our child to have the last piece of cake we say we don’t want it.

But the worst lies are the ones we tell to ourselves.

Separately, they’re small and insignificant, but after we keep repeating them for years, they become a part of our days and we start believing them, things get bad.
We start living in this illusion of being someone we’re not, doing stuff we don’t like, fearing things that can never actually happen, and much more.
We destroy our peace and emotional freedom and start living in our own prison. This also affects every other person we care about.

Here are the lies we tell ourselves and what to do about them:

1. “I’m fine.”

It’s alright to say it when you don’t want to worry your mother, children or friends. But it’s much worse when you start telling it to yourself.
I’m talking about people who have many problems, and instead of doing something about them, they convince themselves that they’re okay and everything is in order.
But the problems don’t go away. They are just hidden behind this lie, and often get bigger and bigger until one day your world collapses.
What you need to do is be brave and face reality.
You’re a normal human being and even if you’re doing everything right, problems occur. You need to deal with them right away so that you can keep living your life and going after your goals with peace of mind.

2. “I don’t need him/her, I’m better off alone.”

We often push the person we care about away because we think it’s easier not to fall in love and show feelings.
But we end up alone, whether we want it or not. And because the lies we tell ourselves can’t go on forever, things get depressing.
I know we’re all secretly afraid of being hurt and thus decide not to have anything to do with this person, because this way he can’t leave us and break our heart.

But you miss out on one of the most beautiful and amazing experiences life offers you – being in love, having someone special to count on.
It’s okay to be vulnerable every now and then. Others are scared of being hurt too, but life keeps going and you never know if you’re not saying ‘no’ to your soulmate.

So admit it: you need him/her and you’re not better off alone.
Go out there and tell someone you love him. After all, even if he rejects you, you don’t lose anything you actually had before. But if he feels the same way, you get more than you expected.

3. “I don’t need to change. That’s just who I am.”

To some extent that’s true.
But often we say that about our bad habits, when we’ve done something we regret and feel more comfortable to just blame our personality than to actually change.
Most of the times that’s because people don’t really believe that they can change. But they can. It’s in our nature. We’re adaptive and when we don’t like something about ourselves, we can change it.
That’s how we grow, evolve and thrive. And when we stop doing it, we stop moving forward in life too.
So the next time you forget to do something, offend someone, complain too much, are negative, procrastinate, hurt someone, or else, remember that this is just something temporary and you can go back to being the great, compassionate and successful human being you’re meant to be.

4. “I can’t do it.”

Here I’m not even going to give any examples. I’ll just tell you that you actually can.

The word can’t is one of the worst lies we tell ourselves and something we must remove from our vocabulary if we want to develop a powerful mindset.

But you’re not wrong when you say that lie. Whatever it is that you believe you can or can’t do, you’re right. Because that becomes your truth.
After all, we all live in our own version of this world and how stuff works.
But one thing is sure – you can do more than you think you’re capable of. Many men before you have proved that. And many more will.
The easiest way to realize that the thing you consider impossible is not so hard to do, is to let go of past failures, fears, doubts, uncertainties and worries, and just give it a try.

5. “I don’t deserve to be happy.”

Wrong.
Everyone does.
Happiness is absolutely free, and the universe has a lot of it. Everyone can have as much as they want, and the more they share it with others, the more it gets.
That’s how things work.
Even if you’ve done something bad, you deserve a second chance. You can become a better person, help others, and be happier than you’ve ever imagined.
But the first step is to stop telling yourself such lies and understand that you’re worth it and can be happy again.

6. “Now is not the right time.”

Say that a few times and eventually ‘not now’ becomes ‘never’.
The truth is that there’s no better time to do what you want than now. You never know what the future has in store.
This moment is full of opportunities – you can tell someone you love him, get stuff done, go after your goals, call someone, start working on something you’ve been putting off for a long time, say sorry, stop smoking, start exercising, read that book, watch that movie, go out, and so on.
Later may never come and all those things you have to say may remain unsaid, and your life can remain unlived. Are you really ready to take such a risk?

These are just some of the lies we tell ourselves daily. As you can guess, there are many versions of them.
This behavior is self-destructive as we ruin our chances to change, turn our dreams into reality and live a better life.
Only by admitting that we’re lying, noticing when we do it and trying to replace the lies with positive statements, can we embrace freedom and be ready to show the world what we’re capable of.
What about you? Can you think of other lies we tell ourselves?

Understanding Female Psychology

“One ought to hold on to one’s heart; for if one lets it go, one soon loses control of the head too.” – Friedrich Nietzsche

Contents:
1.) Introduction
2.) The Cultural Battle of the Sexes
3.) Solipsism’s Role In Femininity
4.) The Role of Rationalisation & Sophistry
5.) In Closing/Relevant Reading
1.) Introduction:

As I write this, I cast my mind back to a time I did not understand women. It is surreal to write on “how women work” when one so vividly remembers being a man clueless in such matters.

As a clueless man bereft of the knowledge my sanity demanded, I would ask men to explain women, I would ask women to explain women, and I would ask Google to explain women. Nobody really knew what they were talking about. The only answers I would get were gynocentric inanities mixed with general rhetorical platitudes such as “be yourself” and “be confident”.
The problem with the mainstream gynocentric viewpoint is it teaches men how to be a good slave, rather than a good master. It teaches men how to cater to women, rather than how to inspire a woman’s desire to cater to them. It actively suppresses truths related to women, whilst spreading vitriolic untruth about men. At this point it seems the system would prefer men are useful but ignorant, rather than enlightened and sovereign.
Men yearn to understand women, for they wish to attract them, as well as protect themselves from womanly predations. This knowledge is essential paramount sustenance all but crucial for the preservation of man’s sanity. And yet quite sadistically, this wisdom eludes most men no matter how earnestly they seek it.
Today, life changing truth is only readily available should a man happen upon a site such as this. Most men are unaware of women’s true nature, and the minority who are aware dare not discuss the elephant in the room, for doing so may come at incredible cost.

2.) The Cultural Battle of the Sexes:
The number of men aware of the realities inherent to female nature continues to dwindle, whilst the cultural hysteria touting “men are evil and women can do no wrong” reigns pervasively.
Men are taught to worship women, whilst women are taught to distrust men. Men are taught to serve women, whilst women are taught to deceive men. Society believes it morally reprehensible for a man to dupe a woman, and yet bares no such disdain when the polarity is reversed, often going to extreme lengths to rationalise aesthetically pleasing justifications for immoral female behaviour.

Before the emergence of red pill philosophy, no meaningful infrastructure existed to support and educate men on matters of women, and this is why what we do is crucial. We educate boys and men on matters nobody else is capable of, and support them where nobody else cares.
Culturally there is a power imbalance where the masculine has become so weak and the feminine has gotten so out of control, that she threatens to destabilise civilization’s very core with a tyrannic power she is not fit to wield. The red pill (as well as this very publication) does to the extent of its reach, attempt to redress this imbalance by giving men the tools they need to exercise power and remain sovereign.

Red pill philosophy is effective, it thoroughly details female behaviour from numerous perspectives (sociologically, evolutionarily and occasionally, economically) to form a rich and comprehensive philosophy.
However, having internalised much of this “forbidden knowledge” over the years, I wish to do something I do not believe has been done before: unify the red pill understanding of women into a framework that depicts the relationships between the mechanisms that embody the feminine.
When I was clueless about women, I’d have killed for an article like this, so if that sounds like you, strap yourself in because you’re in for a treat. You’re going to learn what many men never learn, and what many others pay in pain and poverty to merely intuit.

3.) Solipsism’s Role In Femininity:
One cannot deny that women are vigorously interested in themselves and how men perceive them, yet regardless, this passion does not translate into a meaningful philosophical enquiry on womankind by herself. As such, a woman’s opinion of her sex is inseparably tied up with how she sees herself. To simplify: whatever a woman believes to be true of women, is 99 out of 100 times, something she believes to be true of herself.

Solipsism leads women to believe the opinions they hold of themselves accurately represent the behaviours generalisable to their sex. Naturally most women are oblivious to their flaws, and are as a matter of ego, unwilling to even ponder the possibility they’re not intrinsically wonderful.
Most women do not realise the negative traits they possess should be rectified where possible or otherwise mitigated, because they do not recognise themselves as having said undesirable qualities to begin with. Simply put, women lack self-awareness, they tend to deny their shortcomings rather than fix them, and this is why there is a substantial lack of bodies in the women’s online self-improvement community.

If you talk about the general nature of women to a woman, but you do not distinguish between her and “most women”, she will almost always lump herself in with “most women” and fail to make the distinction between herself and women as a whole. This leads her to constantly miss the forest for trees, stating that “she was in a similar situation and she was never like that” when you generalise her sex.

Now, whilst it is certainly possible the woman you’re talking to may be the exception to something, it is more likely that she is not but believes in all delusional earnest that she is. Because she follows her feelings, and it feels better for her to believe she’s different than to be aware of her shortcomings, she will believe an aspect of her behaviour immune to generalisation even when her behaviours confirm the generalisation!

You may even remember a time when the woman you’re talking to embodied the exact generalisation you’re asserting, and yet like a crazy person with amnesia, she will claim to be nothing like that. This is another “function” of solipsism, a woman’s pre-occupation with the self is mirrored by an utter lack of self-awareness of what said self consists of.

And so it is only in the grand denial of a woman’s solipsism that if she believes there’s nothing “wrong” with her, then there’s nothing “wrong” with women either. If she believes she’s not like that, then she incorrectly concludes that most women aren’t like that either.

It is the observation that nearly all women will unironically say “not all women are like that” that gives away the feminine’s solipsistic point of reference, that a woman will attempt to differentiate herself as superior when in competition, but should you criticise women in general, suddenly her ability to make distinctions between herself and her group vanishes.

In juxtaposition, if something negative is said about men, most men can simultaneously weigh up whether the generalisation applies to men as a group, and if it does, if it applies to them. They do not instantly conflate opinions of their sex with opinions of themselves, and so unlike women, are not reflexively offended by negative statements made about their sex if an element of that statement is based in reality.

Naive men believe “women must be experts on women, because being women themselves they know all about women!” such a belief is folly, and no more than a reflection of a man’s naivety, for it assumes women are abstractive rather than solipsistic, that is, more interested in the truth than being purposefully ignorant in order to maintain an optimum level of happiness. This couldn’t be further from the truth.

When women talk about women, they project rather than investigate because they’re prone to emotional solipsism, not rational investigation. Solipsism is the core base of all female behaviour, it is the intrinsic way of being, the very foundation on which the female’s other psychological aspects spawn.
Women with little power and low self-esteem are solipsistic and prone to infantile narcissism, whilst those with high self-esteem and great power are grandiosely narcissistic, the latter meaning they possess a characteristically masculine air of arrogant detachment.

Where solipsism is her internal dialogue and mode of thought, its external counterpart is infantile narcissism, women’s insecurity of her relative inferiority to man, and dependence on men. If one analyses the thinking of the feminist movement for a second, a great part of it fixates on “empowering women by granting them independence.”

This suggests a few things, that firstly, women do not possess the ability or desire to take independence for themselves and so need powerful politicians to legally mandate it. And secondly, that the feminist fixation with independence is a macro manifestation of female insecurity. This to say, that women are all too aware of their reliance on men for both economic and emotional support, and that collectively, rather than be grateful for man’s magnanimity, a great deal despise it. The saying “no good deed goes unpunished” seems apt here.

Women are deadly, yet needy. They have always needed men, still do, and most likely always will. And yet it is in the infantile stubbornness of femininity that a resentment brews for this biologically ordained neediness.
Even the women who do well to provide for themselves end up requiring a man who earns more than they, who is mentally stronger than they, and so on. A woman is hypergamous by her very nature, and thus much to the disdain of her insecurity, requires male superiority in order to even find men attractive.

The topic of feminine infantile narcissism presents the perfect opportunity to explore why women are more inherently cunning than men. It is because women are so incredibly aware of their heightened neediness relative to men that they develop an intrinsic penchant for cunning. They are all too aware the depth and breadth of assistance they require from the opposite sex is greater than the inverse, and so it is this position in large part which fuels their motive for manipulating as a way of life.

Women are in a position of neediness, and yet they cannot fully trust men to give them what they need, so they manipulate men in order to give them what they want, but then resent the men who fall prey to such devices. This phenomenon alone should explain to you the mental hell women occupy, and explain much of their external craziness.

Even the sweetest, kindest, best raised woman is a cunning creature, for it is in the insecurity inherent to reliance that a woman protects herself via the impassioned practice of cunning. I believe that where nature gave man superior strength, women were bestowed pathological cunning. Unfortunately, what was granted to be used as a means of defence, is often in practice used for anything but.

Infantile as they are, women are ill-equipped to handle power, and that which is born out of the insecurity that a man may do her wrong, turns into an exploitative, predatory misuse of power that fuels grandiose narcissism, and thus masculinises her. The aforementioned relationships between the different aspects of the female psyche do not explain it in its entirety, but nonetheless, should accurately depict its root and core.

4.) The Role of Rationalisation & Sophistry:
In contrast to the prior section, this section will be quite short as many of the mechanisms relevant to this behaviour are aptly described in my distillation of solipsism. Whilst solipsism requires greater explanation because of its breadth as “something she is”, rationalisation requires less explanation because it’s merely “something she does.”
Rationalisation is the grand act of seeking justification or explanation for something that has occurred in order to flatter/benefit the person who performed the behaviour. It is not an honest attempt to understand what causes a behaviour.
Women often do not understand why they feel what they feel, because rationally verbalising primal impulses is difficult if not impossible. She cannot acknowledge that she doesn’t even know why she said or did something as she’ll look stupid. So to save face, she will come up with persuasive nonsense to reconcile the irrationality of her behaviour with the aestheticism of something that sounds convincing.
To simplify, she will find something that sounds reasonable to explain her behaviour, regardless of whether this is the true cause of said behaviour. As long as it makes her look and feel good, it is a sufficient rationalisation that serves the purpose she needs it to.
Women are far less concerned with communicating the truth about themselves than they are maintaining an acceptable image. Again, this is why it is folly to ask women about women. They’re less interested, capable and incentivised to understand themselves than men are.

5.) In Closing / Relevant Reading:
Here before you lies just a few of the aspects inherent to the operating system of female psychology. It is incomplete, as a complete treatise on the topic is not merely substantial in depth, but likewise of breadth. Time permitting, it is my desire to pen a follow up piece that details other aspects inherent to female nature, linking them in with the aspects previously described in order to create a coherent framework.

50 Things Every Girl Needs To Hear

(1) Men are not the enemy. For that matter, neither are women. We’re all in this together.
(2) Find what you love doing and do it.
(3) Don’t let anyone tell you what you’re capable of.
(4) Learn from your mistakes.
(5) Learn to forgive the mistakes of others.
(6) Know that life is a series of highs and lows and that’s okay.
(7) No one is going to save you. Learn to save yourself.
(8) Be exactly who you are and the right people will love you.
(9) Being part of someone’s life is a privilege. Treat it as such.
(10) Don’t try and look like the women you see in magazines. Even they don’t look like that.
(11) You will encounter moments where life seems utterly hopeless. They will pass.
(12) See the beauty in everything and everyone.
(13) Never ever settle for less than what you really want.
(14) Life is far too short to be superficial.
(15) Figure out what you believe in and fight for it.
(16) Question everything.
(17) Be kind. You don’t know what hardships others are battling.
(18) Always be true to yourself.
(19) Don’t bother justifying any aspect of your character or taste.
(20) At the end of the day, the opinions of others simply don’t matter.
(21) Seek adventure.
(22) Never stop learning.
(23) Only give your heart to those who will cherish it.
(24) Your clothes do not define you.
(25) Embrace your faults as well as your strengths.
(26) Believe in true love.
(27) Read.
(28) Trust your intuition.
(29) Surround yourself with people who love you for you.
(30) Speak your mind.
(31) Stand on your own two feet.
(32) Beauty is a feeling that exudes from within, not a goal achieved by pasting on skimpy clothes and 5 lbs of makeup.
(33) It’s not possible to please everyone at the same time, so stop trying. Please yourself.
(34) Playing the victim won’t get you anywhere you want to be.
(35) Learn to enjoy your own company and you’ll never feel lonely.
(36) You’re stronger than you think you are.
(37) Don’t be afraid to remove toxic people from your life.
(38) People who assume they know everything about you just by looking at you are not worth your time.
(39) You will have your heart broken. It will hurt, but don’t let that stop you from loving again.
(40) Material things will never make you truly happy.
(41) Fear nothing but keep your wits about you.
(42) The world is full of all kinds of different people. It makes things interesting.
(43) Your worth is not determined by what other people think of you.
(44) Don’t let anyone treat you like a doormat.
(45) Beauty is a matter of perception. What is beautiful to one person, won’t be to someone else.
(46) There are boys and there are men. Learn the difference.
(47) Face life and all its problems head on.
(48) Nothing in this world is worth selling your soul for.
(49) People can be downright viscous. Don’t stoop to their level.
(50) Finally, live life for what it is: a gift.

5 Women’s Erogenous Zones Most Men Don’t Know

C’mon guys, up your love game!

Sadly, many men seem to think that women’s only erogenous zones are their breasts and genitals. Such is not the case, as you are about to see (and any women will gladly attest to). A woman’s body is, as John Mayer so lovingly put it, a ‘Wonderland.’ There is much to explore and much to discovered. The problem is, most men seem to think turning a woman on means touching her in the ‘mainstream zones.’ What I mean by this is, obviously, vagina, breasts, and buttocks. But in doing that, you are skipping some amazing areas that are likely to arouse a women more than such direct approaches. As soon as you realize gentle touches in the following areas will garner huge responses physically, you will become a zen master of the female body.

Behind-The-Knee

Oh, if you want to talk about a magic button most people (even women themselves) don’t know exists, let’s talk back of the knee. Keep in mind all the erogenous zones listed here are linked to other spots in the body. For some reason, the back (or inside) of a woman’s knee is a direct route to the nerve endings in the vagina. It’s like a direct highway to Shangri-La.

Keep in mind, you stick your fingers under a woman’s knee, it will seem strange as hell. But in the course of kissing and touching, the hand can move there slowly and you will BOTH be pleasantly surprised by the result.

The Ear

Listen, pop culture lied about this one. The ‘tongue in the ear’ thing is gross and turns exactly NO ONE on. BUT, the lobes are very sensitive and tend to trigger pheromone reactions in certain women when they are lightly touched or whispered into and caressed delicately.

Another smart thing to do is run your lips softly against her the outer rim of her ear. Not kissing it, not sucking it. Just letting it know you are there. Her goosebumps will tell you that you’re on the right track.

Behind-the-Neck

Yes, a lot of “behind the” spots on women seem to trigger something. A lot of this has to do with the fact that they are areas that never get touched and are even rarely exposed to air so they are hyper sensitive areas. Touch an area that never gets touched and you will get a reaction.

But it is pretty well known the nape of the neck is quite sensitive. Again, do not be somesloppy beast who licks a woman like she is a popsicle. The point here is to be delicate, to touch women in areas and ways they have never been touched.

If you’re the type of guy who paws at women, you shouldn’t even be reading this.

The Mons

This is the zone to beat all zones, but NO ONE knows what it is. The mons refers the area above the vagina where the pubic hair grows. Because of the hair follicles and nerve endings in each one, lightly caressing and kissing this area will send off fireworks inside her that even the neighbors will be able to hear.

Remember, as with most of these, being delicate is essential. Rubbing her pubic bone and grunting like an animal will do nothing for either of you.

Scalp and Hair

Oh men. Poor men. Why are women’s heads ignored? Most will tell you, a caress of the scalp, holding of the head and hair while kissing, running your fingers through your hair while in bed, all these things work wonders at tuning a woman’s body into the frequencies that all men seem to be on 100% of the time.

If you look over the list, you’ll realize. There is a common theme, which was mentioned a few entries back. These are parts of the female body that go all-too-often ignored. It’s the physical version of ‘how was your day?’ It is a simple gesture that can make all the difference when it comes to the end result. You wanna make love? Make her feel lovely. Yup, that simple.

You make all of her feel beautiful and appreciated and wanted, she will be putty in your hands. Just remember to use those hands for more caressing and less pawing and you’re on your way to being the stellar lover she deserves.

Can stress cause acne?

There are many causes for acne, and yes, stress can be one of them. Scientific research has shown links between stress and acne breakouts. The science behind it claims that “when [the] body is stressed, there is a hormone fluctuation that causes an increase in the amount of oil your skin secretes,” which is what leads to acne formation or worsening of a present acne breakout.

Furthermore, stress can cause one to eat foods that result in one being prone to acne breakouts. Regardless, stress is a cause of acne, but is unusual in that these acne breakouts cannot be pinpointed to their root causes.

Unfortunately, it is difficult to determine which acne breakouts are a result of stress as stress-induced acne looks the same as any other form of acne. Therefore, there are no direct treatments for stress-induced acne.

So then clearly you have to treat your stress, right? There has to be some form of medication that can control your stress and therefore prevent your acne from worsening, or even occurring in the first place.

That’s not exactly how it works.

While alleviating your stress will help in the long-run, you cannot always control when your body will stress and how it will react to such stress. However, there are skincare solutions out there to treat and prevent acne breakouts. Such acne appearance require immediate care, therefore it is important to find solutions that work for you.

Dealing with stress-induced acne can be difficult, and may even add to your stress. Therefore, you should keep in mind what kinds of activities bring stress into your life in the first place and figure out how you can manage the stress when it hits you. Secondly, having a good set of skincare products to help battle acne breakouts will help in preventing blemishes in the first place.

Does Tea Tree Oil Help for Acne?

When it comes to acne care, it is easy to get lost in the variety of options that are out there for treating acne. They are either chemically derived or naturally derived, and it is difficult to choose between the two because the chemical products tend to appear more effective, though not as safe as, the natural alternatives. So how does one decide?

This is where tea tree oil comes into the picture. Many studies have been done on tea tree oil and the effects they have on treating acne.

Research has shown that tea tree oil is just as effective as 5% benzoyl peroxide. Although, the benzoyl peroxide works faster, the tea tree oil results in fewer side effects. Tea tree oil has been shown to be a safe natural alternative as it contains antimicrobial qualities that allow it to kill the P. acnes bacteria that cause breakouts in the first place.

So How Do You Use Tea Tree Oil?

There are many ways in which tea tree oil can be used. Here we found 8 ways that you can use tea tree oil in your skincare routine.

1. Removing makeup (normal to dry skin)
Mix 1/4 cup canola oil with 10 drops tea tree oil in a 4-ounce sterilized glass jar with tight-fitting lid
Shake until blended.
Soak a cotton ball with the mixture and remove makeup as you normally would. Rinse your face with warm water and follow with a toner.
Store the remainder in a dark, cool place.

2. Treating acne
Mix a few drops of tea tree oil with 20-40 drops of witch hazel
Apply to skin 1-2 times a day with cotton swab.
Watch for overusage as it can dry out your skin and stay out of the sun since it can make it more sensitive to UV rays

3. Facial Mask
Add 4 drops of tea tree oil to one egg white
Whisk well, then apply mask to clean face
Leave on face for 15 minutes
Rinse with lukewarm water
Do not use more than once a week

4. Make a tea tree oil rinse
Add 4 drops of tea tree oil to a cup of water
Rinse face with this mix
To be used only once a day

5. Apply tea tree oil directly to face

Make sure skin is clean and dry
Simply soak a cotton swab with the tea tree oil and apply it directly to the breakout
Do not rinse
Can be done twice a day (morning and evening)

6. Homemade spot treatment
Mix a few drops of tea tree oil into a few teaspoons of aloe vera gel or raw, organic honey
Apply directly onto the acne breakout

7. Homemade face scrub
Mix ½ cup sugar, ¼ cup sesame or olive oil, 1 tablespoon honey, and 10 drops tea tree oil
Massage onto damp face in a circular motion for 2-5 minutes
Rinse with warm water
Pat dry your face

8. Add to cleanser and moisturizer
Simply add 2-6 drops to your regular cleanser and moisturizer
Be careful not to get into eyes

Our skin is so delicate and we want to do everything we can to keep it looking at its best. Tea tree oil is safe and effective for achieving that ideal skin, all while being so simple to use.

Should I stop wearing makeup if I have acne?

The debate over wearing makeup while having acne is nothing new. In fact, many of us have hit those crossroads before and still face it. You have acne but you don't want people to see that you have acne, so you cover it up with makeup. But, wearing makeup may just exacerbate the problem so that you end up with more acne and you need more makeup to cover up. The more the acne continues to worsen, the less likely you are to want to take a break from the makeup. And so the cycle continues. 

So what do you do? What is the real answer here when it comes to wearing makeup with acne?

To start off, it is important to recognize how acne is caused in the first place. Simply put, when the body is undergoing a fluctuation of hormones, these hormones cause the oil glands to produce more sebum (oily matter released from sebaceous glands), which then block the skin's pores. Bacteria can grow in these pores, resulting in inflammation and breakouts.

There are various factors behind the initial causes of these hormone fluctuations, such as diet and stress. 

Makeup, although it may not be a cause, can worsen existing acne and lead to more acne breakouts as certain makeup products contain oil can clog the pores, thus promoting that bacterial growth. 

However, in some cases, makeup may actually be beneficial for your skin, especially if they are water-based and contain ingredients such as salicylic acid or benzoyl peroxide (these are known to kill and prevent bacteria growth). Though, be careful with such products as they can dry out the skin, causing the skin to send the oil glands into overdrive and promote acne breakouts. It is important to always remove all makeup so as to allow the pores to breathe.

Other, natural forms of acne treatment and prevention would be tea tree oil. It is just as effective as benzoyl peroxide, without the added side effects. 

So should you stop wearing makeup if you have acne? While it would be ideal to help the skin breathe, you do not necessarily need to stop wearing makeup if you use the right makeup products and remember to take all other steps to helping your skin stay healthy. 

How I Did Some Good Saving on Cross-Country Travel by Road

I have been never much into brainstorming money-saving ideas. However, from time to time, I browse through the tips on cost-cutting, pick up a few that I can easily follow and make a good use of them. There are several areas to cut costs, at least I have learned that but I am reluctant to try them all. One such idea that I have recently applied is how to save money while making a trip across country.
 
I went for a fortnight trip to Sydney from Melbourne by road. After I came back, nobody was willing to believe that I had managed to travel with a petty sum. But I did and here is how I did that.

Moderate Driving
Driving moderately is a way to make improvement on gas mileage especially when you are making a long trip. I made it sure not to go over a certain limit so that I could save on my gas expenses. Most of the motorists pick up high speed while traveling along the highway and during a long trip.
It feels like going on an adventure. But the fact that you fail to realize is it adds to your fuel bill. We had some bags and baggage in the cabin as well as on top of the car. When you carry such loads, it is more important to go slow so that you can get the optimum mileage. It was a tour of 4000 miles that we covered. So it was not a small sum that we saved. Even if small pennies are saved in several aspects of travelling, it could be a big amount.

Discount Deals 
My husband says that I have some bad habits and one of them is to collect discounts on grocery items, clothes or whatever else I could afford even without markdown on prices. I just turned a deaf ear to his arguments and did the same on the eve of our trip. Discounts are available on total packages or individually on some special aspects like hotel booking, flight reservation or special activities.

I did made my vacation plan without involving a tour operator. However, that did not prevent me from enjoying discounts on hotel booking and some particular activities. It was not a peak travel season and most of the hotels had discount offers on booking. Usually, the hotels adopt such marketing strategy to drive the travelers when tourist flow is not very high.

We also availed discount coupons on adventure activities. The organizations running these activities also attract the customers during slack season by offering discounts. We also picked up some passes from our hotel and on the whole, all these contributed to our money saving.

Going for some unusual ways
When you are bent on saving money, you should be ready for some sacrifices if those don’t take pleasure away from your travel. Go with some unusual thoughts to cut costs on your traveling expenses. We booked our hotels for four nights and three days. For rest of our trip, we went for camping. It gave us a real thrill of adventure and at the same time, we saved a lot on accommodation. While resting in camps, we ordered food at the roadside restaurants. Food was tasty but inexpensive.

I managed to save $800 on our road trip. What about your plans on saving money during a trip by road?

20 Things I Wish I’d Known at 20: Sex is personal

A couple weeks ago, in my letter to 20-year-old me, I was congratulating myself on not having been photographed topless. A few days later, I realized that wasn’t strictly true.

My roommate Jen Rector was a photographer, and she took a whole book of very reserved pinups. I’m amazed that I lived in an apartment with a photographer and a full bar and we still only managed to do 1940s-style damage.

It’s a testimony to how cautious I was, which is a shame because your early twenties is a great time to revel in stupidity. Play beer pong with bourbon. Pierce your tongue. Climb on the back of a motorcycle in Indonesia. What the hell.

When you’re young; you don’t have to make smart decisions to make sound decisions. You’re still mapping the territory, so failure is the quickest route between idiocy and enlightenment.

These are a few of the lessons I wish I’d started learning a little earlier. I haven’t mastered them yet, but now you get a head start.
1. Consider the source. If you’re worried about someone who dislikes you, first ask yourself whether they’re an asshole. If you don’t like them, and they don’t like you, that’s not a problem. That’s a mutual understanding.
2. Get off the couch. If you find yourself playing hard to get, don’t pretend to be busy. Just be busy.
3. Don’t waste your time. If you have to play hard to get, move on. You’ll know when you’ve found a healthy relationship because it won’t confuse you.
4. When in doubt, shut up. Silence is a smart negotiation tactic, the best option when you’re processing how to respond, and always more productive than lying about what you’re thinking.
5. Don’t complain. Maybe venting makes you feel better, but letting off steam can also lull you into maintaining the status quo. Unfortunately, the status quo is pissing you off, which is why you’re whining in the first place. If you’re frustrated, turn that energy toward fixing your problems, not bitching about them.
6. Don’t obsess. Worrying is complaint’s ugly cousin. Either use that energy to change your situation, or relax.
7. Find an age-appropriate style. No one wants to see a 20 year old in beige slacks and a wool blazer. Buy trendy clothes, wear the slutty dress, do something ugly with your hair. Be part of your generation, so you can laugh at the photos later.
8. Be polite. It keeps doors open, lessens the potential for misunderstandings, and increases the odds of getting invited back to the beach house.
9. But defend your boundaries. When someone isn’t taking no for an answer, clarify what you want, and then respond forcefully. Being polite to someone who isn’t hearing you is naive.
10. You look good. There’s no such thing as the hottest person in the room. Everyone is attracted to something different, so just take those odds and run with them.
11. Being nice is overrated. In fact, “nice” is the least interesting thing someone can say about you.
12. Keep it to yourself. “She seems nice” is an excellent thing to say about someone you don’t like. Particularly in the company of people you don’t know.
13. Know your audience. When you’re telling a story and someone interrupts you, let them.
14. Let your passion shape your profession. You know that thing your dad says? “If work wasn’t hard, they wouldn’t pay you to do it.” Please. There are professional rock stars, astronauts, puppy trainers, and bloggers.
15. Sex is personal. Don’t bother with one-night stands if they’re not your thing, and don’t judge people for enjoying them (or not). Waiting to sleep with someone doesn’t make you an uptight prude, and jumping into bed doesn’t make you a spontaneous adventure seeker.
16. Focus. The saying, “what you’re thinking about is what you’re becoming” isn’t just chilling, it’s a universal law. Be aware of how you’re investing your attention – including your words, and your actions.
17. Cut yourself a break. Don’t offer a running commentary on your own faults. When you do, the people around you listen. Give yourself space to change your character.
18. Don’t be intimidated. World travelers are just people who bought plane tickets. Pulitzer Prize winners are people who sit alone and write. You can break the most profound accomplishment down to a series of mundane tasks.
19. Choose good company. Ask yourself if a person makes you better or drains your life force. If the answer is B, you’re busy next time they call. And the time after that.
20. Enjoy your body. Odds are you’re more beautiful now than you will be again. Ask your roommate.

10 Little Defining Moments In A Woman’s Life

As I grow older (and I’m writing about this as though I’m about to turn 70), I’ve hit certain moments in a woman’s life that aren’t often discussed, but at some point, happen to every woman.

The moment when…

10. …she stops dressing for anyone but herself.

9. …she decides to accept and love her boobs for what they are — or just uses a push-up bra and is done with the whole thing.

8. …she has the balls to turn someone down, to their face, instead of being polite and telling them it can’t work “right now.”

7. …she says, “screw it” and uses her laptop as a heating pad, which is probably not healthy, but again, screw it.

6. …she stops lying about her age. There are two moments when she does this: when she’s around 19, she stops lying about being older, because she thinks it makes her cool, and when she’s around 27 she stops lying about being younger, because… she thinks it makes her cool.

5. …she fully embraces her inner “I don’t give a fuck” lady, the lady who comes to save all us women at some point. Some are lucky enough to be visited by her early in life. Some of us don’t meet her until we reach our 30s or beyond. But once she comes, she’s here to stay. And it’s so freeing.

4. …she finally stops agonizing over texts and asking her friends to analyze them with her, like they’re poring over the Warren Commission and she’s a second shooter believer. She realizes now that she no longer has time for such nonsense.

3. …and she reaches the point where if they don’t text back, she believes it is entirely their loss, and moves on with her life.

2. …she doesn’t care if she’s tagged in an unflattering photo, because what does it matter, really? She knows she’s hot.
 
1. …she realizes the only type of woman that she has to be is the woman she already is.

6 Menstrual Myths Revealed

Find out if girlfriends' cycles really align, cramps are genetic and more

By now you've probably heard a lot of different things about your period. While some are clearly old wives' tales, others can be trickier to decipher. Whether you're wondering if it's safe to skip the Pill's placebos or if women in close proximity really do sync up their cycles, we've called in the experts to get to the bottom of some of the biggest menstruation myths out there.

1. Your hormones shift every seven years?
There's no such timetable. Your hormones are always shifting because that's what happens throughout the monthly cycle itself. But big-picture changes are also always going on. "Women's hormones are always shifting because the ovarian reserve [the supply of remaining eggs] gets lower and lower as we age," Nanette Santoro, MD, professor and chair of obstetrics and gynecology at the University of Colorado at Denver. The number of eggs in your ovaries in turn affects hormone levels. Specifically, as the number of eggs shrinks, levels of follicle-stimulating hormone (FSH)—which helps prompt ovulation—go up. And this can cause your periods to go out of whack.

2. Women who live together often get their periods around the same time?
Yes, and it has to do with pheromones, odorless chemicals that women produce and release. The theory is that our bodies detect and respond to the pheromones of the women around us, and gradually this creates a synchronicity of menstrual cycles. Strangely primitive, but true!

3. You can't get pregnant during your period?
It's unlikely, but not totally impossible. Sperm can, in rare instances, wait for an egg for up to a week. If you have a very short or long cycle, ovulation can happen soon after, or even during, the bleeding phase, which gives sperm the chance to get lucky.

4. It's not safe to take the Pill without a break?
Not true. If you've been getting your period regularly and you don't want to, it's fine to skip it by taking the Pill continuously (no seven-day gaps). Because the Pill contains progesterone-like hormones, it prevents the growth of the uterine lining, so there's no buildup and no lining to be shed. That's why you won't get a period "There is no need healthwise to physically get a period," Dr. Santoro says. What is dangerous is if the lining of your uterus builds up and doesn't shed, since this can put you at risk for a buildup of precancerous cells. So if you're not getting periods and you're not on the Pill, menstruation should be induced at least every three months, says Sharon Mass, MD, a clinical assistant professor of obstetrics and gynecology at UMDNJ in Newark, New Jersey.

5. Men can get PMS? No. Men do have their own hormonal rhythms, but not monthly ones like women's. And "their hormones don't fluctuate significantly until they begin to lose testosterone in their 60s," says Michele Curtis, MD, an associate professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the University of Texas Houston Medical School.

6. If your mother got severe menstrual cramps, you're likely to get them, too?
Possibly. Doctors say they have seen a generational link, but it isn't clear whether it's conditioning, genetics or both. For some women, "it may have to do with attitude and expectations," says Dr. Curtis. So if you grew up hearing your mother complain about cramps and saw her spend days in bed during her period, you might be more attuned to menstrual pain yourself. But there's no question: "For some women, severe cramping can be very debilitating," says Dr. Curtis. "It's almost like they're going through labor every month." If this happens to you, talk to your doctor about taking oral contraceptives (they can make your periods lighter and less crampy since they stop the uterine lining from getting so thick) or prescription-strength pain relievers.